Wednesday, October 31, 2012

So…. that 31 days thing….

Wow. November 1st is finally here. I seriously thought you would never come. October was a long, hard month, and while I am glad its over with, I learned a whole lot about myself in the process. Its time to reflect.

Prior to the month of October, I wasn't the most consistent blogger. I sometimes went weeks without posting, which made me sad. When I first learned of 31 days, I saw it as an opportunity to get out of a rut by forcing myself to write every day. I think the hamartia in my plan was that I decided this on September 30th with zero time to think of a topic I could write about for 31 days, as well as plan out the posts so I wasn't flying by the seat of my pants every night. Writing ahead was also something that I didn't really give myself the opportunity to do either.  So lack of planning and preparation really influenced my opinion of the experience as a whole.

Now onto the good things. 31 days taught me a lot about myself, as a person and as a blogger. I showed me that I absolutely have the time to write 5-7 blog posts a week. This is where I would like to be for the time being. I am a small operation with still under 200 views a day. As much as I wish I were among the likes of The Nester, Young House Love, Design Sponge or the like, I am not. I am a one lady operation with a full time job and a 2 hour a day commute that actually likes to spend time with her husband and not be on the computer all night long. Sorry to burst your bubble, but I am not paid to do this, ergo I can not crank out long, thoughtful posts 10-15 times a week. 5-7 is definitely my max.

I also learned that I am kinda weak. I guess I didn't learn that, I knew that, but it became glaringly obvious at two points this last month. I have a quitter in me. Its not something I am proud of, but it is there. The quitter fights me every day. I get very defeated and down on myself if I feel like something is too hard, or I am not giving it my best, so I quit. I have quit a lot of things in my life. So I need to recognize she is in there, and fight her tooth and nail because life is hard.

I think the biggest lesson gained from this trying experience is the importance of an excellent support system. The day I decided to quit, I got my ass chewed by my cousin Kristen, and for that I am so thankful. If there is one thing I hate more than anything, it is disappointing people. Weird considering I have a quitter in me… But this really pointed out to me how much people around me care. Like she said to me, Life is hard. Dieting is hard, heck MARRIAGE is hard, but you can't give up. You have to buck up and do something even if it sucks because you said you were going to do it. If you always quit, you will never succeed. Hearing how much she cares about me and my success (even if it is a silly blog thing) meant more than the world to me. I know that when stuff gets tough, I have someone I can turn to. And I know if I ever think about quitting something again, I will have to answer to her, and for that I am thankful.

So while it was painful, it was definitely worth it. I think more than 31 days of blogging about fitness, I had 31 days to prove I could do something, and finish it. So now if you were to ask me if I would do it again, I might still say no lol, but its closer to a maybe than it was 8 days ago.

How did it go for you? Learn anything particularly insightful?

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